Psychodynamic and Dialectical Behavioral Therapy: a Combined Approach to Sex Therapy

Now up on The Sex Talk, Mou chats with LAST team member and Associate Professional Clinical Counselor, Kane Slosburg, on the philosophies they integrate into their practice, and together Mou and Kane dive a little bit deeper into the functions of those modalities, and how exactly they are applied to sex therapy.

Kane received their Master’s degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from The Family Institute at Northwestern, continued there for a fellowship in Mindfulness and Behavior Therapies, and is trained in both Psychodynamic and Dialectical Behavioral Therapies, which they continue to implement with clients today. At the most succinct level, Kane defines these two modalities as:

1. Psychodynamic – this method looks at our history–what we’ve “been through”–and examines how that presents currently, and the things we’ve done to deal with that history, or if we are in fact implementing those things–our “coping,” so to speak.
2. Dialectical Behavioral Therapy – known as DBT, this is a highly protocolized method, which was developed to give people the tools and skills to manage themselves, their feelings, and their reactions to their environments. The full protocol is broken down into three sections:
   1. Individual therapy
   2. Skills group
   3. Phone access, 24/7 —the boundaries here are determined by the client and therapist together, and an understanding is set of the appropriate circumstances in which to utilize this aspect.

Within these sections, there are of course different modules to focus on, in which a variety of skills are introduced, particularly for individuals for whom the full protocol is indicated. Check out the episode of The Sex Talk at the bottom of this page to delve a little bit deeper into how it actually works to go through the full process!

At the end of the day, DBT champions the idea that “two ideas can exist at once,” encouraging us to get away from more rigid thinking. It acknowledges that we have solidified beliefs about ourselves and seeks to help people understand the importance of the word “and,” and how they can combine/synthesize everything happening around them. Essentially, DBT can boil down to paying attention, and managing the feelings and reactions to what you’re paying attention to.

So, how exactly does Kane combine these techniques within the context of sex therapy? According to Kane, many modalities, and tools used in DBT, overlap and intersect with one another across many forms of treatment, both individually and with partners/relationships. DBT’s didactic nature involves a lot of education, a lot of detail, and a lot of emotion regulation–which, when paired with mindfulness, can “beef up” the ability to see, hear, and feel–arguably crucial aspects of successful relationship communication. When you’re aware of what you’re feeling, and know how to effectively communicate that with your partner(s), you can create a “more stable environment” as a team, for exploring one another. Plus, with a more evaluative approach, partners can address questions of “what do you like, what don’t you like?”. Psychodynamic therapy comes into play as it fosters an understanding and awareness of the “cues” (e.g. past experiences, trauma, and environments) that make us react to things in a certain way. Identifying these cues paves the way to employ techniques from DBT to manage difficult emotions, which often get in the way of effective communication with others.

For a more comprehensive look at the variety of tools and techniques Kane incorporates, be sure to watch this episode of The Sex Talk! In terms of their client base, Kane is particularly passionate about working with people exploring a deeper understanding of themselves; people who are exploring gender and gender identity; and helping couples in more high conflict scenarios. As someone still constantly deepening their understanding of their own self, Kane values the work to get people to the point of seeing themselves a little bit more, and turn partners into “explorers and excavators, rather than opponents.”

Check them out below!